I hate being in charge

There's nothing worse than having to tell someone they are bad at a job. It's the worst thing in the whole damned world. I hate it! I hate hate hate it! I want to waste away like Amy Whinehouse and just disappear. That lovely empty can't get here soon enough. Take my thoughts down the river, take my brains to the wash room and flush them with my soul. Get out. Get everything out of me. Not just food. Get the pain, the depression, the shame the pounding of my brains and that voice telling me that every mistake I'll ever make is coming to eat my alive. If only I can get small enough they will pass me over like a rotten grape. I want to be so slim I am invisible. Pray for it.