Sunday, April 21, 2013

Today's wake

Is for a young man that any parent would have been proud of. This young man was a thoughtful, well spoken, fun and intelligent individual. His goal was to join the military, the Marines to be specific. He wanted to serve and protect his country, possibly ending in college and a career in the military. And he could have done it. While he has asthma, he had skill and brains. Those should count for more. So maybe he couldn't get into the Marines, a sterling career in the Air Force is something to be very proud of. What I'm having a hard time wrapping my head around is why? Why would he kill himself? Why do it in such a visceral manner? Why abandon a father that so obviously loved him? His father, while I've never been a fan of this man, was an amazing father. He's a devoted father, who had to go to court and force his ex to ensure his custodial rights. He fought for his son, and made sure that he was there for him daily. He wasn't a weekend dad, he was a constant dad who made certain that his son felt loved and supported. So what happened?

There was not way that this young man was in control of himself at that moment. I have to say he must have been under the influence or suffering from an undiagnosed illness. There's just no way this was a intellectual decision. But then this was something he had been thinking of and planning for. 19 is so young. It's a baby! I feel young at 37... which I know I'm not, I'm an old fat woman, but I feel far to young to die.

May this poor young man rest. May his families find some form of peace. And may we all slow down a little more. Make sure the people in our lives know that we love them, that we need them in our lives. That without them we are less.

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